I want to write a comic book. Then I want to write a newspaper article about the comic book that I wrote. Then I want to pass some local legislation that codifies the theme of my comic book. Then I plan to write a screenplay about the experience. Once the movie comes out, I'll inevitably write a novel about the movie. Then I'll make a movie about writing a novel about the movie . . . and write a book about it. Someone will be tempted to do a documentary about the entire process. Then I'll rob all of the 7-11s in town before going down in a hail of gunfire in an intersection crowded nonsensically with eagle scouts, and that scene will have to be pasted post-production into the comic book, newspaper article, local legislation, novel, movie, book, and documentary.
All of the postmodern novelists of the 1980s would feel fucking owned.
I went ten miles east of Sioux Falls to the nearest casino with poker, just across the Iowa border. I showed up on a Sunday at 6:30 p.m. without calling ahead to make sure that a game was running. I figured that there was no possible way that a game was not running on a Sunday at 6:30 p.m. At the very least, I was sure that I'd be able to get a seat fairly quickly. Well, turns out that I'm a dumbass.
There were two tables of a tourney running, and there was a single table of $1/$2 NL going with a 5-person waiting list, of which I was 5th. Luckily, I had brought a book. I read for an hour or so, without a single person leaving the only NL game, then I gave up.
My first impression upon entering my first casino in more than a year? Old lady perfume. My second impression? Old people everywhere.
I'll head out there again one of these nights, but not before (1) calling ahead first and (2) getting my name on the waiting list.
I like to read a book while I am playing live. Reading a book makes me vulnerable to some rather obvious tells, I guess, but I doubt it. I try only to read the book after I've folded and before I've been dealt the next hand. How can I give away a tell at those times?
Anyhoo, people often act strangely when I'm reading. "You're reading a book . . . at the table?" They are equal parts curious, incredulous, and confused.
"Yes," I say. What other possible answer is there?
I don't know. Live poker is just so boring. I think being observant at a $1/$2 table is overrated. Plus I like to read.
All of the postmodern novelists of the 1980s would feel fucking owned.
I went ten miles east of Sioux Falls to the nearest casino with poker, just across the Iowa border. I showed up on a Sunday at 6:30 p.m. without calling ahead to make sure that a game was running. I figured that there was no possible way that a game was not running on a Sunday at 6:30 p.m. At the very least, I was sure that I'd be able to get a seat fairly quickly. Well, turns out that I'm a dumbass.
There were two tables of a tourney running, and there was a single table of $1/$2 NL going with a 5-person waiting list, of which I was 5th. Luckily, I had brought a book. I read for an hour or so, without a single person leaving the only NL game, then I gave up.
My first impression upon entering my first casino in more than a year? Old lady perfume. My second impression? Old people everywhere.
I'll head out there again one of these nights, but not before (1) calling ahead first and (2) getting my name on the waiting list.
I like to read a book while I am playing live. Reading a book makes me vulnerable to some rather obvious tells, I guess, but I doubt it. I try only to read the book after I've folded and before I've been dealt the next hand. How can I give away a tell at those times?
Anyhoo, people often act strangely when I'm reading. "You're reading a book . . . at the table?" They are equal parts curious, incredulous, and confused.
"Yes," I say. What other possible answer is there?
I don't know. Live poker is just so boring. I think being observant at a $1/$2 table is overrated. Plus I like to read.
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